[CURRENT CONDITION: DEATH]

I lay here tossing back in forth in my bed trying desperately to rid myself of the events that just occurred, but I can only think of how much I want to die. I know I have said it a lot, but this time, I’ve taken enough sleeping pills to soften the blow. People always told me, I would die by own blade. I guess they were right. I’m tired of always failing. I’m tired of thinking I’m doing something right, just to find out that I am only making things worse. Tonight, I learned that I was stealing happiness from my best-friend. How selfish of me. I only thought about making myself happy, and not worrying about what makes her happy. That is why I have decided…to end it all. Tonight, I have taken 10 sleeping pills, and I plan to do worse later, but I have also been punching the hell out of my wall, so my hand is very sore right now. I’m such a fucking failure. I think I am going to just block her and her boyfriend too. I just have made life worse, and it seems like I’m only making it harder for me to breathe.